Christmas

Christmas has been lovely; spent it with Perlilly and her fantastic family down in Oxford. A beautiful, beautiful time. And, yes, in love again. And, yes, big, big changes afoot, and much more mutual this time, and seemingly totally different, and amazing, and awesome, and good...but the big question - the question of the day (or week), as it were - is, where to go on holiday? And - also - what to do about this idea of doing a master's in Creative Writing, at either Uxbridge or Sheffield? And, therefore, where to live?
    And the answers? Well, on the latter, nothing's really emerged for Uxbridge, apart from the course being good, but nothing on the job front that would lead me down South, so, I guess if I'm going to do one it'll be Sheffield, up in Yorkshire where I already have a job and a stable life and - if I want it, from the beginning of February - a room in the house that I always wanted to live in all along. So that seems pretty clear - unless something comes to divert me from that.
    As for going away, I really haven't a clue; it's strange because there's not really that much in me that wants to go away, or that wants to go anywhere in particular, although a break from things would be nice. At first I thought it would be India, but then I heard about Bruce Parry's ibago experience in Gabon and thought that would be pretty wild and adventurous - but probably not easy or wise - and then I thought maybe New Zealand, or Israel, or Thailand, somewhere like that. But nothing stands out. At the minute the plan is to get a dice on New Year's Eve and let it choose one of six places and do that. Number six, however, will be labled "other" - and other could mean anything, including going nowhere at all. My Glastonbury psychic said somewhere "third world" - and that appeals to me - but that rules out New Zealand and probably Israel; I suppose India's always the easy option. It's just so strange doing all this without having any real urge, and having it based/forced by work/timing and not on my own mad impulses; it's new for me, I guess. Still, no doubt whatever it is it'll be wonderful and all work out and I'll come back having had a great time and learned loads and been totally refreshed and reminded and re-energised and good.
    I've had such a grand and lovely time this Christmas; I'm tired right now, and having a downward hour - after four solid days of fun and joyful socialising - but it really has been such a blast. I feel like I've learned a lot, been loved, had a change; life is too incredible for words sometimes.
    "I love you," is what I want to say right now - and good that I can, because I'm here.
    And then: "I love you too."